The Glamorous Life

Being a mom is anything but glamorous. When Kylan spits up on me I frantically search for something to clean it up all while she screams and flails in my arms. My options to choose from most often are:

a) my nursing pads (yes, they are pads for ma boobs)
b) her socks
c) a wipe and/or burp cloth, although never conveniently around
d) nothing

Unfortunately, in the wee hours of the morning option D is most favorable. So I'm currently blogging in a shirt soaked with curdled milk. How sexy.

Speaking of sexy, Ken continues to shower me with compliments. "What a hot mama," he says. Um excuse me? Have you taken a whiff of me yet? I smell of spoiled milk and bad BO. I'm sticky from milk leaking all over me and not having time to take a shower. I have poop under my fingernails. And how 'bout my sunken eyes and crazy hair that hasn't been combed since labor and delivery? Not to mention my fat pouch that jiggles like I'm married to Mr. Clause.

He just wants to get laid.

Anyway, I have mom things to do while my little rocks away in her swing. So I leave you with this hilarious youtube video and some pictures of the light of my life.